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You know that your mother would be utterly ashamed of you if she knew, because you're certain that her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat in her life. By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, sending up a stream of water to rival Niagara Falls that sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the toilet paper dispenser for fear of having your bottom dragged off to Australia.At that point, you give up. Your skirt is soaked by the splashing water, your blouse is sticking to your back, there's pee running down your legs and your expensive Aubade knickers look like the cat's been sleeping in them. You're exhausted. You try to wipe yourself with a crumpled bus ticket you found in your pocket, and slink out inconspicuously to the washbasins, but not before laddering your tights on the broken door latch which you now discover has a bloody great nail sticking out of it.
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