1, the day at a friend's house, where did not find the phone does not know to take friends about his girlfriend's phone call and listen to where it is. I enter my number, according to a set aside key, the screen showed her my name saved: SB3 (and then was pleased, but fortunately, a third ...)
2, when I dig pocket, a key out was not found, then go back and find!
of young lovers in the roadside, where the men suddenly moved to say: Who is it? In the end is this?
I thought is the key to quickly say: My, my! My
later learned, turned out that the woman was pregnant. . . . Poor my face ah. . . Pain for a few days
3, group meetings in the school today and suddenly sneezed accident, raised his head, it was found in front of the girls nose Biao to the back, and the woman is not aware of, so secretly want to help her erase, just his hand up, next to the girl discovered, shouting That dinner will be students, drinking 一杯接一杯 dry, one would have reflected the stomach. . .
rushed to the toilet, not stand on the spewing out of a place full of ah. . . . Susu mouth back down, nothing like people. After a while, friends got up and said to the toilet, I kindly advice: When dropped into the bang bus card slot in the
7, high school, a job well done, the job, the teacher gave me this batch of 2 words, redo,
morning I went to 2 Mai Zaodian, and handed the job to help me pay him the same table,
most parts of the classic he wrote after the elderly in a redo, do not do. pay,
Next ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, more tragedy on a tragedy is about to graduate, and he told me ,,,,,,
8, walking in the crowded streets behind the high-handed whistle suddenly sounded hurried sound, not react, a Buick commercial vehicles to hit my shoulders; I'm not angry, just gently took out the key, In the course of its progress from start to finish the plan of the Road, a beautiful arc
9, in a stall to buy socks, a pair of cheap, would have to buy thirty pairs, the results only the same black style, and selling socks 忽悠 I said, a color is good, lost a top who can take the other can not see ... a thought also, he bought a thirty pairs ....
two days of a change so the ...
results after a fast for two months, it could not stand at my table and said: you lazy dead,
thick skin, how say two months, you do not even socks for a pair of
I :....
10, the recent cooling, and on the highway to see a strong man, open-top driving that a sports car, wearing a motorcycle helmet.
11, on a whim, take your own photos as your desktop ... and then my computer to a virus ...
12, high school with theory nonsense
Fei, Ai Fei, do not leave I ... ...
13, to say the right things
my wife the day before to find a wife online financial software, I'll give her computer, I sit and watch, the wife of skilled open www.google. com, in the search field type >
14, to say the students parents.
his parents first love. One day to go shopping, his mother spotted a down jacket, but a look at the price to pull his father away.
his father said: we can not afford can not try? For his father to his mother forcibly into the locker room.
out for his mother, his father take a look at the East West Chou Chou, took his mother and ran, said: Run! While the salesperson is not!
his mother wearing a leather coat, the label floating outside, dragged by his dad flew out, just passing through a pillar, holding a post his mother cry. His father turned serious and said: Run! You are not waiting to be caught ah?
his mother cried even more fiercely. Then his father burst out laughing: Ha ha ha ha ... ... clothes when you go in the money I paid before.
15, batch job, see the students do not draw geometric problems, readily Comments: No plans no truth ~
16, his girlfriend want to check calls, send text messages to 10086: still calls me left many
17, students A car accident, leg fracture, several of us play a good hospital
students entered the hospital to see his
Ministry
I met his parents Ask A quickly forward to the results of an open condition
became
.
18, on the high school, the most funny thing
that would be no money, we often pool to buy cigarettes, the day both me and my buddy just bought a ready Heyan
go to the toilet pumping, the results for class, the class teacher of the class, forget it
first class when the class to see the guy sneaking wrote a note, and then rub a big group, I throw over
by the class teacher can see, the class teacher directly down off the table, standing on the podium and began to read
sweat ing, if I know the above is written in what, I would rather swallow does not give her a mouth
class: In addition ZJ
belly laugh hurt ... ...
appeared most classic
... RZ
19, my roommate make fun of me, and I hide the purse in a little box, MD The problem is that little box that I want to mail a Nvwang Guangzhou gift, I send too much bad out two days later found himself without a purse. I am in Wuhan, my ID card, bank card, his girlfriend's photographs in Guangzhou Nvwang hands.
20, yesterday in Wal-Mart, suddenly hurt my stomach, suppressing burst into the bathroom, just an earth-shattering eruption began to squat, the results of the children next door burst into tears, her mother asked her how she said the smell ~ ~
21, arrived in the coastal, uninstall completed. Task is a fielding drill attachment for anti-landing exercise division, and everyone flew the vehicle to prepare. I'm using grease gun to the road wheel lubrication, fat political commissar standing behind me for a moment, concerned said: small comrades hard it! There are 12 tanks did not expect the wheels to boost the morale of soldiers, tanks, not easy ah!
I was moved almost to tears.
22, is always on the high school class that we gather to smoke
day I just have a more proud to tell you what, I smoked the results of other people are pumping slow
finished, I left half-root, look fast for a class, the big mouth and suck two
teacher suddenly came in, I asked myself a thrown on the ground, and stamped a foot
sucked, but just had two cigarette Hold your breath
have seen the class teacher, came over and asked me, you do not smoke
I shook my head teacher: teacher talk
anger continued shaking his head: you gave to me
Me: I ... do not ... pumping ... smoke ... (along with the smoke spewing from the nose and mouth continued)
teacher has not choked laugh ... ...
23,
gucci necklace, today, to have dinner with work colleagues , both of us ordered a plate of fried eggs, pepper, and found a hair, and my colleagues to pick up the hair with chopsticks, shouting, you see the boss ~ ~ What is this? Owner of a look, oh,
shoes usa, sigh ~ called, to, come! To the lady for a pair of chopsticks
24, spent 50 dollars on the Internet bought a piece of hand-made face soap, did not use the two days, the evening found the time to think about with a half has been thin, above, these are bubbles, anger me vomit blood.
My dad said, you're that good with soap, bath covered with slippery.
25, Pisa, Italy, the first time to eat, do not know Chisha to 38 per cent point is 8 yuan to send a cheese course.
meal complete, found that something was lacking, I thought, had fewer copies of cheese,
then shouted: Waiter, my share of cheese not on how ah? I have finished, but also to not make people eat?
Waiter: Sir, that you have poured your cheese pizza ...
me: okay, you go to busy bar ...
26, at noon back to the dormitory, see me cup with Coke, direct a full drink. My face was green finish. Quarters that the original man bought a bag of dumplings vinegar, no place to fall, with my glass installed. . .
27, topics like the teacher to join them, one day the teacher Topic: >
28, I'm kind of forgetful, bath last night and forgot to turn off the gas ...
then my mom helped me clean up the mess on the side of the side said: So you must not sin, because certainly leave evidence of a crime ...
29, to complete a physical day, not hungry, went to restaurant for dinner, many people, too crowded, too chaotic, I call on the ladies Dafan: this Kindaichi, just saw the second page to tears, I do not know which days to kill a certain person with a blue ballpoint pen and drew a circle and write, this is the killer ... ...
31, High School next door I like true story ..
person A teacher in the class were found to sleep ... well done ..
he called a solution to the blackboard topic .....
not Write the words to a public humiliation for a fact did not come to the blackboard
teachers began to sour him ..
school grades are so bad they dare to sleep ought to be ashamed
head is not on the whole family ... day only to sleep ...
did not expect to write ... .. he actually has a very nice solution ...
teacher got a little embarrassment ... so I let him back seat do not control him good ....
He actually did not think the teacher was kind enough to choke one ....
I'll sleep for about
you still will not ask to be my
32, My brother went to play basketball in a primary school, a low-grade girls asked to hear a low-grade boys: have let you take snacks, you say I love your ..
33, saying that my girlfriend to play summer jobs, sold in a mobile phone handset
Square One day at noon, lunch time, almost no stores, my girlfriend came the counter next to an uncle-class people will look at mobile phones, just not that section of the counter eating MM, weakly, and looked nothing like the uncle that bought the phone Zhu Er, no it on the counter with his arm supported her head, because the MM chest (crab) of relatively large, the uncle suddenly found watching it to see MM's milk (crab) channel, eyes are watching straight, and my wife found out, would like to remind you that the MM, the results of MM no response, a few minutes later, MM openings: Big Brother, watching enough? seen enough to buy a cell phone it ... ...
Results uncle two words did not say, bought a cell phone running for the door and fled to the ... ...
34, heard friends say, a colleague of his relatives to Xiamen, Xiamen, e relative to the one cartoon, the public car, the driver looked at this person e cartoons, wanted to find the location, the driver stopped him and said: The driver said: in the toilet (school dormitory toilets,
cheap ugg boots uk, squatting) toilet, squatting for too long legs a little buzz, so he propped the door handle to maintain balance, and then feel they have to come out of a toilet, so he began to force, unwittingly hand also used force, the results 。。。。。 I X, locks broken, I'll roll out.
you could think you were the friend of a friend out to see the scene?! a light ( crab) Ding students suddenly rolled out from the toilet, but also accompanied by a toilet in his jet out of PP, absolutely shocking!!! and all of a floor, basically all know, I X!! this life In this group of students suppressed before the ...
36, the morning her husband took me to the unit left, and then I suddenly received his text message: people away, immediately went to you, dear. the more people bus windows were shut, the car smell bad some people are naturally frowned. But that look of MM it is natural to her from his pocket and saw a straw on the side of the mouth and to windows open a gap, greedy sucking the air out of this by no means the general ah 。。。。。 =. =
38, we always like pretending to maths teacher told me a humorous joke that no one laughed
we discuss the spoof on him a whole class, so the first thing he said when the school, we all laughed in unison
day he came in, silent a moment that he dad died, I immediately
laugh, others silent.
39, water and soil it
see a cashier in a very serious number of a child ran across a pile of coins
, ran to sing: in front of Bridge downstream through a group of ducks, Come Come count, twenty-four thousand six hundred seventy-eight 。。。。
and then the cashier is depressed by half the number of coins to go back and re-number ....
40, high school boarding school, some students go home to let him help me picking up some things, they send text messages: to the point of my clothes and money to burn.
41, and girlfriend, dating, see There in front of a lot like my girlfriend to go up the next shot her ass.
she turned around and gave me a slap.
then someone took my shoulder I turned around ...
girlfriend gave me a slap.
42, the day suddenly take a phone call: Well guess there is a gift! Not that I hang up! ally met the sudden call to my office and said: Xinghua sent to us this enterprise.
the news really so sudden, when we were in the army, then do not say no, feeling particularly good. lost contact a few years ago, never thought he suddenly came to our Xinghua . I told him on the phone, I immediately went to pick him up their cooperation unit, get together at noon.
I went to their cooperative units, boy! companies really have style, full of foreign management mode, joined the company the door to cross-examine the defense together, register, signed by particularly strict about my comrades who are deployed units who agreed to guard me into the company.
I went to the old comrades in arms said the workshop, the old comrades see I, nodded at me, and made a face. That means I can understand, not to rush, do not allow parlor, let me wait a bit on the side.
I bored, in the workshop in turn for a while, from the bag and pulled out a newspaper point of view in the shop door again. suddenly there was a boss who went to look behind me, stood beside a security guard, he looked at me, patted my shoulder and said: It was the boss, and you are still here he did not know what mix mixed. I have received, by the way and then steal someone else's, got off the phone to send the patient to go to the oral medication, I gently into the room and gently wake up the patient shot and simply say: Grandpa, up and stealing food now!
45, last night, crab boil, the water boiled, I put the crab into the pot one by one. crab is very fresh, tamper with in the pan.
accidentally hit his wife good to see not This, then hid behind me did not look over his eyes.
I am relieved and said: Allison, we are not too cruel?
wife: ah ... ... ... ... salt of the do?
46, this bus, there is a one-stop driver asked: said to me: you do not install the
48, Dragon Boat Festival is coming, the unit sent a box of milk and a bag of Shang Hao Thai rice, the unit of a female colleague asked me to help after work He moved back home, to the downstairs, the colleague said to me: , it must trouble you to help me hence. My husband was not at home, quickly! take more than, NND, the district where there are many people that know me. he wanted to remind her not to call the: . My husband was not at home, quickly, and so anxious now! spit out a word: the students, not school today, school
50, middle of the night four points more than a friend called to say the words: Missed calls so call to ask you what matter. incredible, is not a curse, then read the paper, it says that tomorrow, if you do not copy the contents of this paper 50 times to other people, they would die is difficult to see so much more. to scare my students , the home to quickly copied the night 50. the next day to other people, at first sent out a few, but then we know what it is, do not say he was fed to the paper, so the morning passed, his hands were also positive for several decades.
afternoon music class the first lesson, the teacher happened to point to let him sing his name, saw his tearful boy stood up and said sadly: How can the mood to sing .... ah ....Japanese, fluent in English so that he did not understand a word, but a strong sense of patriotism told he could not lose face in front of the Japanese, and he smiled and nodded blindly: person riding a bicycle on a high speed on!
53, my wife and I went to Wat Pho to play, and his wife walk the road, so I carry her.
saw an old lady, serious to say: see you who also read the book. his wife was sick to the hospital earlier, Buddha is useless
54, the students travel, reached the top, a special girl shouted at the peak of excitement: motherland, ah, my mother! then a crush on this woman special boy shouted encouraging: the motherland, ah, my wife's mother!
55, my house has been rented to a Japanese guest, one day, Guests who hit me a call, with a not very fluent in Chinese, said: ! knock the whole, the seeds was placed on desk drawer shell,
afternoon to class when looking at melon shell and greedy, so the seeds are including shell and into his mouth again, feeling tasty Well..
class when a classmate asked me what to eat, I can only say Chi Guazi shell, specially spiced buy seeds shell, only a shell without meat, that is, the taste of food.. The results of a bunch of students around one afternoon in my seat I licked the side twice to eat the seeds shell....
57, go to school when school is built, opening in September to a lot of new life. One day a new lesson seems to be holding on behalf of a pile of work, asked me: br>
59, high school military training, the first day of class, is the language class.
not rest over the same table, sleeping in class.
teacher to see, to answer this question. So the 53 students to answer this question. Language class representative gave me up to answer! a P, The result was a loud bang next door, electric motorcycle alarm
61, take the bus, I sat in the front row window seat.
half an hour later, I head out the window.
there is also a buddies back, head extended out the window.
I shouted to him: , vomit, and dirt paste that boys face.
that brothers yelled out, my next friend, Bangdayaoyuan, and that brothers, said:
62, high school love to play, GF see me play often, there are times I shot column in the practice, she ran, said: or so) I say try it!
I do not know which roots are able to get results, and a great volley, a direct headshot! !
cry on the spot, this thing does not talk to me a week!
63, my bike with my friends that I lost, bought less than a week, sad.
friends say you that Suansha, I bought a bike, just one look and lost:
friend asked someone to buy a bike, multi noon, he was in the kitchen cooking, just listen to House Next someone shouted: fire, wiping hands, down the stairs.
NND, car gone ... ...
64, bought a ipod touch, my friends and I say the screen is very hard, not film, the key planning are all right. . I then scratched with a key. Grass
65, once the bell rang after a catch on the boys burst into the room, rushed to the last row, the teacher spoke up: some students were late to come in from the back door, do not affect others! Boys sit down, that out of buns, a bite. He found next to a beautiful MM, has been staring at her. He also thinks that MM did not have breakfast, so attentive to buns to her. The teacher has spoken, the ugly face: some students even late, and still the classroom breakfast, they eat also forget, do not send buns to the lectures the teacher it!
66, my father and mother said, when I was with them stay in the guesthouse, the morning they found that I was clever to take the toothbrush, the problem is the hotel sink is higher than my people, they ask me how to load into the water, I took them into the bathroom, pointing to the toilet ... ...
( hilarious , laugh you die you killed yourself !)
and his wife walk the road
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