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He stared blankly at the guitar and thought of her. Both had given him so much pleasure, but he'd never been able to properly express his gratitude. He never told her the truth about how she made him feel, about how much he loved her, and when he did, the song reaffirmed that he should've kept his mouth shut. At least she'd still be alive. But the song was pure and he wanted to play it for her. Even if her physical body wasn't present, he could still sing to her in heaven. He wanted to jam but was afraid to touch the guitar.
Then Mayne saw an alternative. He scooped up the almost-dead whiskey bottle and finished what little was left. It slipped silently from his hand. Very drunk, very drugged out Monster Lady Gaga In-Ear, he staggered over to the piano. The smoldering cigarette on the bedroom rug had burned its way over to the goose-down comforter. The cover caught and flames quickly spread throughout the bedroom. Discarded clothing acted as kindling and soon the bedroom was on fire.
Until several hazy hours ago, Mayne's life, no matter how miserable, had been something most people could only dream about. It was all an illusion, and he was one of rock ��n?roll's elite, a hero. Now wholesale marlboro cigarettes, he'd been reduced to his basic self and nothing really mattered. He felt the thorns wrapped around his heart and for the first time in far too long welcome to cheapdreheadphones dot com (1), felt human again. He'd smothered his spirituality in drug abuse. He'd stunted his health and personal growth with vice. He'd blinded himself because he was afraid to see that his purpose, his gift in life, was to be true to himself. And the only time he was able to find that inner truth was when he played his music. He softly tapped the ivory keys, making melodies come to life through his fingers. No matter how badly his hand hurt newport 100s, he persisted in making music. He was determined to play for Elizabeth and all the other angels. With every fluid run, every harmony, every musical accent, his inner pain subsided a little. With each passing musical note, he became one with the music.
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