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Sony Z134GX/B
Compliments
Pros: Intuitive valuation (a pack of gum for the recognition of a new haircut; a Manhattan apartment for “You’re so much more talented than that person of similar pedigree and background”).
Cons: Empty praise is inflationary; protests from Tea Partiers to return to Emily Post Standard.
Sarah Ball
Brett Berk
Sasha Bronner
Todd Eberle
Bruce Feirstein
David Friend
SunHee Grinnell
Bruce Handy
Marnie Hanel
Michael Hogan
Jamie Johnson
John Lopez
Dee Dee Myers
Matt Pressman
Todd S. Purdum
Hamish Robertson
Henry Rollins
Mike Ryan
Rebecca Sacks
Julian Sancton
Nell Scovell
Krista Smith
Marc Spitz
Eric Spitznagel
Juli Weiner
Jim Windolf
Zombie-borne virus vaccine
Pros: Prevents death in the event of flesh-to-teeth contact with the vengeful undead.
Cons: Cannot be taken with most cholesterol medications; must be administered 15 minutes after zombie attack or victim riskSSFSLDKFJS AHHHHHHHHH MUARHHHH.
Featured Posts
Archive
Cigarettes
Pros: Small,
Canon XHA1S, lightweight,
Sony HDR-CX700V, widely available,
Canon EOS 7D 70-300MM Lens, internationally valuable,
JVC GY HM700U, cool prison-movie frisson.
Cons: Easily breakable,
Apple MacBook Pro 2007 Edition, cause cancer.
Pennies
Pros: 50 percent chance of good luck.
Cons: 50 percent chance of bad luck.
We’re getting reports that pennies are already accepted as currency.
Sarah Ball and Bruce Handy contributed reporting from New York.
Cans of soup
Pros: Provides sustenance.
Cons: Cumbersome,
Apple MacBook Pro MC026LL/A, indivisible,
hp EB 8460P, expires after a few years,
Sony Handycam DCR VX2100, not yet a consensus on whether Chicken and Stars™ is worth more than Chickerina™.
Topics
Twitter followers
Pros: Docility,
Lenovo ThinkPad T410s 2904-GFU, portability.
Cons: Bad jokes,
Toshiba Portege R700-S1332 PT311U-01202V, ######## celebrity-death rumors,
Thinkpad T420, de facto disproportionate economic influence of Justin Bieber.
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Contributors
Gold
Pros: Pretty,
Canon Vixia HF11, may hedge against inflation.
Cons: Often appears tacky when worn with certain bright colors.
Beanie Babies
Pros: Adorable.
Cons: Kind of creepy.
Rupert Murdoch,
HP EliteBook 8740w XT909UT, The Master Mogul of Fleet Street—Vanity Fair’s Latest E-Book The Debt-Ceiling Debate Reimagined as a Super-Secret Bipartisan Pizza Party Parting Shot,
Panasonic AG-HVX200! Do the Aliens in Cowboys & Aliens Represent John Boehner? (and 24 Other Urgent Questions)
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